I’ve spent this last year in a flex-state where the majority of it I kept questioning “what am I going to do now, because nothing I’ve done before is working for me anymore.”
As my logic has been swearing that I’m just “unlucky” + “going through a dry spell” right now while nothing seemingly goes according to it’s plan… another voice helps me recognize this is simply a part of The Process.
Ah, ‘Creative Intelligence.’ It’s been a while since I’ve listened to you! Please, please… share with me your input. I’m in unfamiliar territory and can’t seem to find any clarity from my logical mind over here.
It seems you have been fighting The Process. You are in the stage of transformation. Madame Butterfly is here to remind you that you too can have grace each step of this process.
Take a look at her. She starts her life as a caterpillar. She does not see her mother, she doesn’t have a clue of who she is destined to be! She breaks free from her egg and begins eating. She’s voraciously hungry in life. She spends her days taking in sustenance from the bush she was born on. That is, until she loses her hunger. And it’s a good thing too. She’s stuck! She can no longer sustain herself doing life as she has been doing it. There’s no way for her to make it to another bush… and the one she is eating off of is nearly finished up! “Something has to change”… and she knows it in the very core of her being!
Needing change is a natural thing, really! And her needed change is nothing like she has ever known before. She doesn’t know about her next step. She cannot access a crystal ball, seeing her upcoming cocoon process, or hear her mother’s promises that she’s truly going to get to wear the most beautiful outfit for the rest of her life. She simply keeps being her authentic self… even though she’s about to go headfirst into the unknown abyss and meet her first death: Death of the person she’s always been!
Her caterpillar body goes into an unknown process to her. She’s never done it before. This hardened shell is wrapped up all around her, and she completely shuts off from the outside world. Inside the cocoon, she loses all sense of her physical self. Every aspect of how she has related to the world outside of her is completely changing. Every molecule of her body is transformed by going through a liquifying process. She ceases to exist as a caterpillar. Seemingly, she has lost everything! She is now liquid jelly; the most flexible she has ever been. She doesn’t even have eyes to see what’s going on with her in the moment. Disoriented + unable to do anything about it, she simply is in her process of becoming.
Over some time, she forms into a butterfly. Only she still doesn’t know what she is just yet. As she comes out of the cocoon, she cannot fly. Her wings are too small. You do not see her jumping off the branch, or ending her life out of hopelessness. She holds on tight. To her, it’s about 30 minutes. For you, it can feel like an eternity. But her wings are growing… and so are yours. She is no longer the person she once was, and neither are you. She literally cannot take in the same sustenance to nourish her and give her fuel for her life. Instead of eating from the dense bush, she must taste essence and nectar of the gods. And so to must you. Yes, this is your process of becoming too!”
Yesssss! Thank you Creative Intelligence. You are my genius!